Sometimes in life, we need a reset.
It’s time to make a change (or changes).
And there is nothing wrong with deciding we need change in our lives; lifestyle change, career change, self-confidence change, weight change, mindset change, relationship change, style change. In fact, I think change is fantastic and so important to a full life. It’s evolution.
The nature of our lives and the world around us is evolution and if don’t evolve and change with it, we will wither, either physically, emotionally or spiritually. Or all three.
But change is hard, because life has inertia, so changing directs is very physically and emotionally tough. But we can handle this, in fact we are made for this. Toughness and stress are what allow us to get grow and get stronger, again both physically and emotionally.
So what now?
You know that something in your life just doesn’t feel right. This “doesn’t feel right” feeling, could be in the form of a blaring siren or a dull pulsing ache…or anywhere in between. And rest assured, if your discontent may only in the form of a dull pulsing ache right now, but understand that if left unaddressed the ache will turn into a blaring siren.
But don’t wait until the discomfort becomes unbearable. You deserve bliss and joy, right now.
Change needs a Reset.
And here is my 5 Steps to Reset.
1. Motivation
Ok, so the idea of willpower is not real. Many people think will-power is something you have or you don’t, but that’s not true, there is motivation and with the right motivation commitment can be created. So, it’s not will-power that pulls you through the hard times in the change process, it’s motivation. And to really put fire behind our actions, we have to really understand our motivations for wanting this change. So when wanting to make a change in your life, you must ask your self ‘Why?’ **Hint: typically your first answer to this “Why’ question is not the key to your true motivation.
For example, let’s look at weight loss, many people want to lose weight, but it doesn’t happen for them over and over again. Why? Well, it’s not because they are weak or lack will-power, it’s because their motivation to look different (or the same as “everyone else”) doesn’t really meet the need that they are truly searching for, such as self-confidence or inner strength or value, success or worthiness. And once these are discovered, they can be addressed along with making structural changes that support weight and lifestyle change.
2. Mindset
This is a biggy! You can not have a physical change (location, style, money, weight, body, career) without having a mindset change. When I am working with my clients, we work on mindset a lot. You can put the wheels of change in motion with structural (habits, choices, diet, exercise) changes, but it’s the motivation and mindset that ignites the spark to create forward movement and momentum.
Mindset change is very individualized because it includes personal limiting beliefs, restrictive behaviors, and empowerment. But the most important mindset shift we can make is, knowing we can do it. Understanding that whatever we desire in life, is already ours. All we have to do is create it in our minds, know it will happen, set the wheels in motion and start working. It won’t be easy, we will have to work for it, but with the right mindset and motivation, the work will be rewarding and even fun. #joy
3. Plan
This is the structural part of change. We must make a plan and then develop a strategy on how we are going to achieve this plan. Ok, let’s take a look at the weight loss for example again; the plan is to clean up our eating, decrease our calorie intake and increase our movement to achieve weight loss. The strategy is meal planning, keeping a food log and scheduling our exercise throughout the week. **Hint” This is the part of weight loss that is a multi-billion dollar business around the world, and the thing is, all weight loss plans work, be real sustained change requires a change in mindset and the right motivation (the spark)
4. Commit
I think one really important part of goal setting, is to have a time-line (I am not alone in this thought). Studies show that change only starts to solidify after 21-45days of consistent repetition. So that is why I think, 21day and 30day challenges are so awesome. They allow you to Reset in a big way. These are most fun, when done as in a group (like the Joyful Warrior #30in30 challenge or the #30daysofYoga), because community lends support and accountability. But community and accountability can also come from finding a lone partner, workout buddy, friend or coach, who can help reinforce you. Along with setting bigger, 21 day, 30day or 45 day goals, commit to smaller goals as well. Meaning, take it one day at a time, one meal at a time, one conversation at a time, one minute at a time, then recommit to yourself again and again. Don’t forget to celebrate your wins (there is no small win, there is only #winning)
5. Congratulate
Congratulate yourself frequently along the way on the successes and small changes you are making. When we get goals, like loss 20 pounds, we only congratulate ourselves on lost pounds and look at the looming 19 pounds we still have to lose. If this is our only measure of success, we will constantly feel like a failure. But if we must congratulate ourselves on the small steps we are taking along the way we will reinforce our motivation and grease the wheels. We must say things like “Good job for ordering that salad!” or “Awesome job on that workout, I didn’t want to do it, but I did it!”, ” Today I did, X, Y, and Z, and I am awesome.” This constant reinforcement while keep you on the right track, help you stay in touch with your true motivation (see step 1) and maintain momentum.
Imagine that your ideal, best self is down the road in front of you, but there is a big ole’ boulder in the way. To get to your desired self, you have to push that boulder. Well pushing a boulder is hard, sweaty work, you are working through inertia and friction to get it going, so it doesn’t move very easily in the beginning. And maybe we really don’t feel strong enough to push at first, but as we are pushing we are getting stronger. Then as we are pushing and getting sweaty and sore, we look down the path and see that our ideal goal is waaaay up there and it seems so far away. We get discouraged and wonder if we should stop pushing. But that will leave us in same uncomfortable place we are now. So, it may be far up ahead, but that doesn’t mean you should only look ahead to measure our progress. You should also look down at millimeters we are moving. Pretty soon those millimeters turn into centimeters, then meters, then kilometers (miles for us Americans) and pretty soon that boulder is practically moving on it’s own. Yes, pushing the boulder will still be tough, but now you know that you can do it. You know that your boulder will continue to move, even if you encounter a bump in the road. Because, you have already done that the hardest work (motivation, mindset, plan, commit, congratulate) in the beginning. Plus, now you are stronger and can dig deep to give that boulder a hefty shove to get it over that bump. You will be there before you know it.
You got this.
You will get to yourself. And you will be stronger because of the journey, and you will have seen some really cool shuff (see what I did there?) along the way!
Get Busy, start today! Your life is yours to create! Your life yours to design!
It will be awesome!
You are awesome!
I believe in you.
Fly my Friends!
XO,
P.S. Remeber I am always here for you! Do you need a Reset in your life? I can be your support, let’s set up a discovery session today! #magic
**Now I want to hear from you! In the comments tell us about what changes or Resets you want to make!
