Let’s talk commitments here, people!
Commitment is defined as “the state or quality of being dedicated to a cause, activity.”
Many of us have a lot of commitments that require our time and energy. And most of the time we work hard to keep them. We will race around, rearrange our schedules to get our kids to their soccer practices, piano lessons, boy scout meetings, we want our kids to have the best childhood experience possible. We will create time in our calendar to attend that school fundraising meetings or work function because we committed to them. We don’t want to let them down or disappointed them in anyway.
We have high standards for ourselves, when we commitment to and for other people.
But why don’t we seem to hold the commitments we make to ourselves in as high regard as do commitments to and for other?
What’s up with that?
You don’t allow your child to miss their soccer practice because they don’t feel like it,but you don’t maintain that same level of commitment with yourself about your workout, your book reading time at night or the no snacks after dinner.
Are you not as important as your child’s soccer practice?
You are. In fact you are more important. But it’s possible that you have gotten out of the habit of keeping your own word, and you don’t trust yourself anymore. You are out of integrity with yourself.
Everyone talks about how relationships take work, and that is true. But very few people consider the relationship you have with yourself as a relationship you have to work on, cultivate and cherish, but it is. It is the most fundamental and significant relationship in our life. In fact, it’s is the starting point for how we behave in the other relationships in our lives.
So start to take notice of your actions, and if it seems like you just keep breaking your own word, start to create change around that. Frist of all, be compassionate with yourself at the moment, and then ask yourself why?
Are you overcommitted and just don’t have time to spare (that creates another why question)?
Is the need for action (the commitment) coming from a should place not want to place, so the motivation is just not there?
Or Do you have some limiting beliefs and mindset work you need to tackle first because that is getting in the way of consistent action?
Whatever the reason, (hint: it’s often a mix of a few of these), integrity with yourself takes practice, especially if you are in the habit of not holding your word to yourself. Good news, habits can change, you just have to start, create different action and when a roadblock comes in the way, dig deep and ask yourself why?
Ok, I have a challenge for you. You know that change you have wanted to make for a while now? Commit to it for 30-45days, straight, no excuses. No reason is good enough for you not to follow through, there is always action or a “figure it out/make it happen” you can take.
And then recommit every day.
But an important step you must take, is to support yourself in such a way that you can’t help but… go to the gym daily/not smoke/not call shit$y ex-boyfriend/not shop/write 1000 words a day/eat well/work on your new business… You have to set yourself up to be successful and then make non-negotiable.
Create an environment where you can thrive and “I can’t because…” reasons are not easy to create.
Every time maintain your integrity with yourself, you solidify the trust you have in yourself and the relationship you have with yourself gets better, stronger and more loving.
Simply, you love yourself more. And this creates momentum, and momentum is the fuel for change.
I want the best for you, but that’s not enough. You must want the best for you, too. And you must have faith and trust in yourself that you can do it. So cultivate that trust on a daily basis and congratulate yourself on your achievements, not matter how small they seem!
So keep your commitments to yourself. You are worth the time, effort and energy.
Fly, my friends!
With love,
Sally
