“Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny”
– Mahatma Gandhi
So our beliefs become our destiny. What are your beliefs about yourself, your life, your circumstances, your_______? Are they creating the life, career, relationships, memories, experiences, you want? No?
Ok, great, now let’s change that. What if I told you, your thoughts about yourself and your life are not true. They are simply figments of your ego and sub-conscience to help you navigate your world, depending on your past experiences. But is our life is not unfolding the way we want, then maybe we should examine our thoughts to show us where we might be limiting ourselves.
Often the limitation is fear. Fear of embarrassment, failure (making us bad), punishment, rejection…on and on. And these Fearful thoughts are created by the Ego, the little voice in our head, who get’s his/her ammunition from our subconscious beliefs about ourselves and situations in our lives. The only objective of the ego is to keep us “safe” and it’s idea of safe is to keep us the same and small. But the same and small, leaves little room for grow, creativity and possibilities…these are the specialty of our soul, which creates our vision.
For many of us, our fear voice tells us that our soul’s journey and vision isn’t possible. But I am here to tell you that’s not true, because what the Fear voice is saying isn’t true and the thoughts it produces are not true.
I work a lot with my clients (and myself) on uncovering, discovering and learning about their thoughts. When we take time to listen and uncover our thoughts and the seeds of our thoughts, we find that in the places where we feel limited and stuck, we are living and reacting from a place of fear.
And this is how fear gets into the driver’s seat of our life. And Fear normally drives us in a direction that we don’t really want to be going. Fear normally takes us down the smal old road, that is boring and dusty, with nothing cool to look at. It’s limiting, and at best it doesn’t allow us grow, expand and sparkle and at worst it causes us physical and emotional pain because these thoughts and stories we have created are painful and destructive.
And your soul wants off that boring, hot, dusty road, because it knows that you have more to offer and more to experience.
The solution is simple, pull Fear out of the drivers seat and take control of the car and change your direction.
Now, I’m not saying it’s easy, it’s hard and uncomfortable. But it’s also empowering, fulfilling and gets easier with practice.
And here is how:
- Nicely ask Fear nicely to move into the back seat. Make it clear that you’ve got it from here. When Fear starts to protest, stand firm and say “Thank you for your concern, I know you are trying to love me in the only way you know how, but I got this. You are welcome to hang out in the back seat if you want.” Now, Fear is going to be a horrible back seat driver at first, but you can stand firm and he will quiet down after a while.
- Start driving. This will be exciting and scary at the same time, but #yougotthis. You may not have all the necessities to start with, but you will figure it out, just have faith in yourself and the journey and it will unfold. Also, You probably won’t not have a clear idea of your designation, but keep the faith and you will figure that out too.
- Know it won’t always be smooth roads or clear skies. You will probably make a few wrong turns, get a flat tire, get lost, you even may need to stop and ask for directions before you arrive at your destination. But stay positive, look at your progress so far and stay in the driver’s see.
- Take good care of yourself and your car along the way. Sleep and get out stretch your legs when you need to, listen to your body. Stop see the sights, listen to some good music and always take the time to stop for necessary fuel. These things will help you stay alert and aware during your journey.
- Remain alert and present while driving, because fear is always watchful and he can start talking you into taking over again. And never underestimate his sneakiness, because he knows all your shame triggers and hurt buttons and will use them in a moments notice… if he feels it will be helpful. He is tricky and if you let him talk too much, he will know just what to say to allow him to take over again. And maybe you got a little drowsy, or got too directed and you suddenly find yourself in the back seat again. It’s fine, don’t panic, just ask Fear to take a back seat again, saying “ Thanks again for your concern, but I can take over from here”
- Keep you eye out good friends and good supports along the way. They will be invaluable in a bind. And the good ones will help you stay present and alert along the way, especially at night. And just having someone to talk to, makes it more fun!
- Because, last but not least, have fun! That’s the whole point of this trip after all! Have fun, find joy, share joy and if you see someone in your travels, who looks lost, or is falling asleep at the wheel, just lean out your window and ask if you could lend a hand. Offer to let them follow you or maybe even let them see your road map, but don’t be convinced that your path should be their path, because their path is only their own. Just like you, they will figure out where they are and where they are going. Helping them may take a little extra time and effort, but it is worth it, it will feel good and you will gain a new friend, and friends are good to have on this journey (see above).
Life is a journey, make sure you, not your fear are in control of your destination.
Happy Travels, my friends!
With love,
Sally
